Where are you going? Where have you been?
I think about these things often when I look at him. Twenty-two years old with a mind full of ideals that the world will never conform too. What love is. What kindness is. What a good life is. And mostly, what a good person is. I wonder if I also felt this way when I was twenty-two. I believe I definitely did. I remember distinctly hating many things, and now I don’t know if I could name one thing I truly hate. Well, maybe balloons… and definitely roller backpacks.
I never spent a lot of time with him as we were growing up. I had moved away from home when he was still in Middle School and he never really wanted anything to do with me then. He was busy with thirteen year old things that will always, thankfully, remain a mystery. And I was busy with my boring boyfriend and finishing up my Associates Degree at the community college back home. However, lately, all we have is time together.
The world is an intricate place. A perfectly timed machine of moments and coincidences that lead us through our lives, day by day, from the moment we are born, to the moment we die. It just so happened that I had hit my personal rock bottom at about the same time my brother reached his. And so he came to drive the 4 hours it takes to get here in the middle of the night and landed at my doorstep at 7am, McDonald’s breakfast in hand for me. When I opened the door, I never saw a more lost person standing in front of me. I wonder if he thought the same thing about me.
This has been a wonderful blessing. I have been honored to really learn about him and his life. Best of all, Squeakers can spend time with him every day. There is no better therapy than baby therapy. We get to have family dinners, watch movies, go for walks, and complain about life together. I needed this just as much as my brother did.
We should always consider ourselves lucky when we get the opportunity to truly help another human being. All those random moments from birth and on have intertwined your fates in such a way that only you have the ability to assist them. Regardless of how the situation appears, it is really both of you who are gaining something.
Happy with family,